filler

Ξ April 30th, 2005 | → 2 Comments | ∇ General |

Your Birthdate: April 12
Being born on the 12th day of the month (3 energy) is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life.

The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental.

There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, sometimes “couldn’t care less” attitude.

You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression.

Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing.

You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters.

Your mind is practical and rational despite this tendency to jump about.

You are affectionate and loving – but very sensitive.

You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

 


Ch Ch Ch Changes

Ξ April 29th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

I had a challenging night last night. I had an anxiety attack which, suffice to say, sucked monkey ass. I wrote a big long entry about it, but it was a little too personal to be out in the universe, so I changed it to a private entry. The important person read it.

Gah, I created drama. Damn anxiety. I’ve been dealing with a lot of personal issues around my health and my conception of myself and how I had seen my future going, and I think I just short ciruited. It’s hard for me to talk about. I don’t tend to share my stressors with people in my life; I like to try to deal with them on my own. Normally I can manage on my own quite well. I don’t like to be vulnerable at all or show insecurity because I feel like I should be strong so that I don’t let my loved ones down and I worry that they will pull away if I’m not strong for them.

On another note, because I feel like redirecting my thoughts – I am almost through a 10 day cycle of antibiotics. They’re really hard on the body; thankfully my guts haven’t taken too much offense. I’m actually amazed I’ve been remembering to take the doses 3 times a day, normally I forget.

Off to bed.

 


More Fun Junk, surprisingly accurate

Ξ April 25th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |


Your Life Path Number Is 7


7


You are a peaceful and affectionate soul… and by nature rather reserved and analytical.

The overwhelming strength of the number 7 is reflected in the depth of thinking that is shown.

You will garner knowledge from practically every source that you find.

Intellectual, scientific and studious, you don’t accept a premise until you have dissected the subject and arrived at you own independent conclusion.

This is a very spiritual number and it often denotes a sort of spiritual wisdom that becomes apparent at a fairly early age. You need a good deal of quiet time to be with your own inner thoughts and dreams.

You dislike crowds, noise and confusion.

You are very thorough and complete in your work, the perfectionist who expects everyone else to be a meet a high standard of performance, too.

You evaluate situations very quickly and with amazing accuracy.

You rely heavily on your experiences and your intuition, rather than accepting advice from someone.

Your hunches usually prove to be very accurate, and knowing this, you are one who tends to follow the directions they seem to guide.

It’s easy for you to detect deception and recognize insincere people.

You aren’t one to have a wide circle of friends, but once you accept someone as a friend, it’s for life.

You really aren’t a very social person, and your reserve is often taken to be aloofness.

You actually like being alone, away from the hustle and bustle of modern life.

In many ways, you would have fit in better in much earlier times when the pace of life was less hectic.

In the most negative use of the 7 energies, you can become very pessimistic, lackadaisical, quarrelsome, and secretive.

A Life Path 7 individual who is not living life fully and gaining through experiences.

A negative 7 is a hard person to live with because of a serious lack of consideration.

The negative 7 is very selfish and spoiled.

If you have any of the negative traits they are very difficult to get rid of.

At your worst, you feel that the world really does owe you something – or in some way you aren’t being fairly treated.

Fortunately, the negative 7 is not the typical 7, at least not without some mitigating positive traits.

This number is one that seems to have some major shifts from highs to lows.

Stability in feelings may be elusive for you.

What Is Your Life Path Number?

 


Music Whore,er Score

Ξ April 25th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

Your Taste in Music:

90’s Alternative: High Influence
90’s Rock: High Influence
Hair Bands: High Influence
80’s Alternative: Medium Influence
80’s Pop: Medium Influence
80’s Rock: Medium Influence
Adult Alternative: Medium Influence
Classic Rock: Medium Influence
Heavy Metal: Medium Influence
90’s Hip Hop: Low Influence
Alternative Rock: Low Influence
Old School Hip Hop: Low Influence
Progressive Rock: Low Influence
Punk: Low Influence
How’s Your Taste in Music?

 


What next….

Ξ April 25th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

So it’s done. I gave my notice for my dojo today. I’ve been told in unequivocable terms by my Dr. that I can not do any high impact training with my lower legs anymore, which effectively rules out kicking targets, heavy bags, or people in the head. I’ve been told that I may be able to do non-impact lower body training again in the future, but not until I give my body a chance to heal. My ankles are that fucked up.

I’m taking glucosamine sulphate with the hope that it will help rebuild the cartilage and give me some more cushioning to work with. If it works I will be able to do low impact training in the future. If there is no improvement, I am not sure what I’ll do.

Bleh. I feel derailed.

 


A lovely graphic representation

Ξ April 24th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

I didn’t need to know what my ankles look like.

 


lessons

Ξ April 24th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

I just learned that if you swallow a glucosamine sulphate pill with a mouthful of cola, that the two react to form volumes and volumes of gas, resulting in much spewing and hacking.

Lesson learned.

 


With good news comes the bad news

Ξ April 23rd, 2005 | → 1 Comments | ∇ General |

I got my x-ray results back today. I have moderate arthritis in my ankles. At this point it’s bone on bone throughout my right ankle, and my left seems to have 10-20% cartiledge left. It’s wear and tear arthritis from repeated high impact during 20+ years of training.

The doctor suggested I try Glucosamine sulphate as a way of attempting to repair the cartiledge in my ankles. He said a 6 week trial should let me know if it will help or not, and that I should not do *any* training at all for 6 weeks – no running, no impact, no stomping on people’s heads. I’ll do weight training like I originally planned and swim for cardio.

I really hope the Glucosamine Sulphate helps.

I would rather have had Chrohn’s than have arthritis. It wouldn’t have stopped me from doing the sport that I love. If my ankles don’t repair themselves, then I won’t have a choice – I’ll have to stop.

 


Done!

Ξ April 22nd, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

I am home from my gastroscopy and colonoscopy. I even have nice pictures of my small bowel, large intestine, rectum, and something that I don’t remember what it’s called. I am somewhat resistant to sedation so I mentioned that to the nurse and doctor. They ended up doubling the dose to get me under, and gave me the same dose again during my gastroscopy because I woke up 5 mins later. I woke up for good about 30 seconds into my colonoscopy. The colonoscopy felt okay until the Dr was going around corners. Then it hurt. But overall it was a much easier experience than I expected. I was able to watch the whole colonoscopy on the monitor. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – I have lovely insides.

I don’t have Chron’s disease!

The Dr said she took biopsies (I watched her take them) to make sure there is not another underlying condition. She found a polyp in my large intestine that she removed. She said there’s a 6-10% chance of polyps getting cancerous, so I’m happy it was seen and removed.

The cause of my chronic runs and nasuea and tummy pain?

Not enough beer!

Well, ok, I’m lying.

I have Entamoeba Hisolytica. It’s a little parasite that fucks up one’s insides, and can actually be quite serious in some cases as it’s the same condition responsible for amoebic dysentary, except I was without the dysentary. I have a prescription which will cure me in 10 days! Then I will be as healthy as a Wolfe!

Now I wait for my ankle x-rays to come back, which I was told could indicate osteoarthritis, bone disclocations, or a slight likelihood of a bone chip. There’s no major ankle instability so the tendons and ligaments seem to be being discounted, but if the x-ray doesn’t show anything I’m going to ask to eb referred to a Sports Med Clinic. I can’t deal with not traing or being able to run because my ankle locks up!

But yay, I don’t have Crohns disease!!!

 


Argh!

Ξ April 22nd, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ General |

I’m preparing for my gastroscoy and colonocopy tomorrow. I started my liquid only diet last night at 11pm, and this afternoon I began the less pleasant part of my procedure – flushing out my system. It is an unpleasant experience to say the least.

I really do hope I never have to go through this again. Bleh.

On a hopeful note, I’m greatly looking forward to having a huge hamburger tomorrow after my oscopies. I’m so absolutely famished now that by tomorrow I’ll be ready to eat an entire cow. Well, not an entire BIG cow; perhaps only a very small cow.

I had my ankle x-rayed today. Doctor visits everywhere. One might assume I’m not healthy or something. Really, I am quite healthy! I hope the x-rays show why my ankle locks up, catches, and grinds. I sat down on the toilet tonight and the flexion of my ankle made my ankle pop. It was not nice.

Hamburger ommmmmmmmmmmm Hamburger oommmmmmmmmmmmmm

Soon I will be at one with the hamburger.

 


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Quote

    Woe to the man whose heart has not learned while young to hope, to love - and to put its trust in life.
    Joseph Conrad